• 17/3/26: Right! I've managed to get myself back into this (my interest of this lasted about 2 days) I've been watching "I'm Autistic, Now What?'s" video on autistic burnout and it's strange. I've not 'realised' anything per se, but it's come back into my knowledge, I guess. I've got no idea how to word this (this will become a running theme). I cannot stand going to college, I don't talk to anyone other than one of my lecturers (and only sometimes), I don't know why I even go in everyday. I've got no idea how to structure this, I'm going to ramble and you'll read (if anyone does actually find this) after writing that note, I've lost my train of thought, I'll aslo make it clear that I won't omit anything from this blog, everything will be said. I can't even focus on writing this blog... I've been looking at tumblr this whole time. I hate myself. I've been thinking of dropping out of college but if I do that, I've got nothing else to do. I have got 2 days off per week for work experience but that's not sorted yet and you'd think I'd enjoy it more than college but it's just a different flavour of grey to go through and even after work experience is sorted out; having nothing to do is better than having something stressfull. I doubt I'll be any good at it. I just want to kill myself, I want to fade away and let everyone else get on with their lives.